I find myself very, uh, that.

(Thanks for calling me)
Gak, I can really sink into a black hole and find it hard to climb out when I'm really feeling sad. Bully only.
But now, I'm finding every single little thing very funny. And I hope that it'll always stay this way. Cheers.
Tumblr's been a big help to light up the dark days, in motivating, in being strong.


"Best friends are those who know your deepest, darkest secrets and have found your major flaws but love you anyway."

-- Quote found in Sunway Pyramid and agreeing every single bit of it.
I'm really glad and thankful to have the girls around with me to cheer me up, together with that specific guy who will never let me down.
Yes, you know who you are.

There's actually still tears trying to be held back when you are to be mentioned. Haha. But because of this, I learnt not to rush into any new relationship, because the result of the new one just might end up the same previous way in a suffering matter. Well, Mich made me realize how strong and relaxed I can actually be. But one thing is that I'll always and forever will be thanking my friends who were and are still there for me when I needed company the most. Xi, Beh, Pra, Karen, Shally, Ling, Mel, Ee, Mich, Gene, KJ and especially Chan, Ben and Uren. Life is a bitch, but we still gotta hang on. Sometimes it's just hard to control the challenges given, but one thing's for sure is that one can either go through it smiling, or simply frowning. What happened in those 14 months will stay in those 14 months. Memories will not be forgotten but will be left as a learning state. The scar in the heart will never be healed, but it will forever remind me of what, when, how, why, and at-least-I-learnt. I don't care about the promises that you make, because they were meant to be broken in the first place. The past may come and haunt me, but for now, I'll try to control it if possible. I want my love story to be a great one to be told in the future. One day, I'll be saying I've moved on. Some day, I'll look back to this day and think how crazy I've been. Friends and family are happy for me now, and so am I to myself. =p

SPM and STPM are almost over!!

So can't wait to find the loved ones to go and yumcha when they are stress free!
Cilaka Christopher never came out since September. And kinda feeling guilty not finding Wen Yi or Song Yee. Not to mention ML. And, and, and we saw Pra slumber only walking on the roadside the other day. Thanks to me and my special, famous blue car, yes, he saw us at 80km/hour and WAVED back! Yeng!

Anyway, December started out not bad. Went on a huge shopping spreeeeeeeeeee with someone to hold EVERYTHING =p new shoes ♥! Went high and spammed KJ's wall like nobody's business. I think I forgot how I could be when I'm not thinking about, nah. And after weeks of being a bookworm for story books and novels, it's kinda getting boring again =.=
OMGeeee la! Where's the ohm!

I can't wait for sem to reopen.
English Literature on the first day of college next year. Yay! It can't be that bad except the fact that I'm gonna be alone there.
Saw the all the money-sucking massage chairs at Block A. Would wanna see where they placed them in the library and taking up all the space.
75 minutes to get to UCSI on a Monday 8.30am morning! You are so kidding me!
Nah, I just wanna do something instead of slacking at home feeling bored 24/7. Wanna go out! And yet at the same time wanna be a guai lui and stay at home ;)
Why are they no nice movies out there now!
Not to mention sleeping at 4.30am is so hahahahahahah cool and not cool! Feel like such an owl.
Subtract the headache part at night and in the morning la.

Hmmmmm out of stuff. My mind is a weird place to be in, because I am this random girl who blogs about absolutely uninteresting stuff.
Memories for self in the future! Cheers!

She smiles

I used to find myself smiling at the things that remind me of you.
Now, the smile has turned into emotionless stares.
Absolutely neutral because I disallow my thoughts to roam into a danger zone which in the end might have my mind stab my own heart.
But thanks to you, I learnt to take notice of other things.
I now smile at other stuff.
♥

When these awesome people I call my friends make up my day

People do crazy thing when they're in love.
Well, people do CRAZIER and stupid stuff when they get hurt, say get a really hurtful heartbreak.
That's how harassment, revealing dark secrets, threats and murders happen.
That's why I couldn't hang on to the if-you-love-him-then-let-him-go concept.
That's why I did forceful stuff and said hurtful things without thinking of the consequences.
People just go crazy and stupid, irrationally when they can't accept what's going on.
I'll prove I'm not one of them,
because third time's a charm.

I lost my black pen in Kindergarten, and I found it in Christopher's mouth

Christopher Laurence, people, is this 6-year-old child with autism. He's as thin as a stick and weights only 25kg. He doesn't eat and would need to be watched closely or he'll accidentally drop his food on the floor. The only time he drinks is when he sees his mum appoaching after school hours. He does nothing in school and well, basically keeps singing the same phrase of a song the entire morning. I think he's Sabah/Sawarak mixed. He roams around like nobody's business and loves curling in the curtains. If he can't reach the curtains, he'll stand on chairs or even the table. Well, give him anything, say a duster or ruler, and it'll be covered with saliva. Either that or it'll be in his shirt.

He doesn't talk much, yet yells and shouts in a tone.
During the Graduation Ceremony last Saturday, amazingly, he said
"Daddy, Mummy, I love you. I love dancing Kungfu Panda. THANK YOU."
His mum was in tears.
Although Chris' sentences were unclear, soft and he said it really slow, it touched me a lot.
***Kungfu Panda is a dance for the Kindergarten's concert.

Christopher is heading to a special primary school next year. He's actually a smart kid. All the best.

I hate how all my anger turns into tears without the 'anger' word in less than 2 minutes.

Another semester break come and go

Nah. It'll be another 6 more weeks before the holidays come again.
Short semester! It's so gonna be stressful and busy, busy, busy!
And after these 6 weeks, the boyfriend and the gang would be going for their co-op (aka internship). Leaving me and Mich alone.
Sobs.
Time to find Karen and her that Eu Jin! xD

Well, a lot happened in the past 2 weeks of holidays. Spent a lot of times with yours truly's family.

1. A 4D3N stay in Penang with 5 of the UCSI family. The first and second day was superb! Tiring, but we had fun! =D It was the third and forth day that was raining, raining, raining the WHOLE DAY! Wait, did the second day rain? Uhmmmmmmm..

2. Picnic at Bukit Jalil park! =D Waiting for sis to upload those few dozens pictures on Facebook.

3. One-day trip in Malacca with cousins in 2 cars, which one car's tire punctured in Nilai. Ouch. It was Nationals Day, soooooooooooo. Next time? =s
And sun burn still itches right now! Oh that's a mosquito bite.

4. Spent 3 hours painting grandfather's room. It was a tiny room and we used up ALL our energy! Exhausted!

Not as exhausting as having problems with the boyfriend. Petty problems and I have to make it seem so, so big. AGAIN. Me sorry. But, again, we're okay now. ^^ Still moving forward together, still being strong together. Love you. ^^

Mum's is starting to have her syndromes towards menopause.
Argh! Tahan, tahan, tahan! Shhhhhhh. =p

I used to love the holidays back in high school. Now, they're deadly. It's the time where ALL your besties would wanna hang out together. It's also the time where your relatives would love to spent extra time with you. Not to mention your parents would think that you have nothing to do for the week and make plans EVERYDAY!
I need time to breathe!

So here's to the beginning of a new semester.
I still need time to breathe but not that long!
Monday classes 9.30-11am, followed by 5-8pm.
Nah. Cheers.

Currently turned into Red FM's late night love songs.
Yup, yours truly here has been listening to the radio from 11pm-12am every night!
Well, almost, every night.

*9.25AM now! Shall run for class!! xD

Finals will be EASY

Just the first exam for the semester and everyone comes out of the exam hall shouting "What on Earth?"

Anyway, July has been fun and hectic. Once again, assignments all came crashing down at the same time as usual. Really got to get used to it, don't I?

It takes a lot of patience

What to do?

This is life.

Envy couples who hold hands in campus.
Even out of campus do we stop doing that much now.

Eating chocolate makes you happy because it contains phenylephylamine - the same hormone the brain triggers when you fall in love.

Saujana choir 2011

Reminds and brings back a lot of memories. =]

Congrats on getting 3rd place and beating 13 other schools. You guys deserve it.
♥

When music talks and walks out of that room

The difference between an E and an E flat is just like the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

Cheers

They say you can only choose 2 out of the 3 when you step into college : social life, good results, sleep.

I want all three.
Hence, I'm stressing because that 2000-word Expository Writing Assignment is dued next Wednesday and we haven't touched a thing.

Cheers.

What's been recently up is this 30-seconds commercial we have to do from Advertising class.

We ended up deciding to have a theme about sunglasses and 4 of those smart people from class went to hilltop under the hot sun.

That mind set you have when the lecturer gives assignments regarding something that needs you to climb over mount everest

So, so true.

It's been 11 months. Shhhhhhh.. :)

You told me you love me, so why did you go away

I want to be in your arms, where you'll hold me tight and never let go.

Call me awesome, in my dreams

The times when you nap/sleep for those few hours and wake up feeling more tired than not resting at all just because your dream was about chasing some bad guys or some muahahhaha kind of suspicious people and you're that awesome detective who can do amazing stuff like jump over a cliff while riding a motorcycle that's engine was gonna die soon, holding up torch lights investigating that dark place that has to always look so spooky, swinging over to the other side because the bridge just so coincidentally snapped off, and and and you've managed to catch these people on motorbikes by just chasing after them on foot.

Talk about getting some rest and not resting at all.

ONE and ONE

Two weeks (gummy-bear-like creatures that sleep facing the ceiling)



Four weeks (starting to have features of a puppy)



Seven weeks



3 months



5 months ♥



7 months



10 months
[ Act Cute! ]



365 days, have Sesame and Miko been living in this world. I'm really thankful they were never dognapped the other time in January.
Happy 1st Birthday to the both of you. I heart you always, and your mum, no matter bald or fluffy. =]
Evennnnnnn if you still do pee everywhere, or bite off all the slippers the world has, or chew every corner of the sofa sides, or jump and try to sratch my face every morning, or when you start to "meow", or mate with each other. This is starting to get endless. =.=

Nah. I still love you guys.

Not to forget the mother. ^^v

***One reason a dog can be such a comfort when you're feeling blue is that he doesn't try to find out why.

Together, they become one

Together, they are invincible.
♥

Of words and words or words

We I fear rejection,
want attention,
crave affection, and
dream of perfection.

Life's stuck with courage or coward?

I pick coward.

Isn't it suppose to be simple?
When in reality it's so much difficult.

Tears wanna flow.
Yet they can't find the courage to do so.

Is there more important things in life?
Because I've forgotten how it felt.

Definitely a lot more important things to look forward to.
Hang on.

Inspiration tends to strike at weird timings.

But where is it when you need to hand up projects the coming MONDAY?

Because 520 only comes once a year

Misunderstandings are the only thing that blocks us from time to time.
And you say I make all the sacrifices when I did nothing but blame, to realize it was miscommunication splat right at our faces.
Still a little sick and I can tell you didn't fancy the outing as much as I did.
Yet you smiled and just said "It's worth it."

Love.
What my dad explains it as "Because I was blind."
It can be irritating and annoying.
It could be fights and arguements and huge expectations.
But it's also the thing that makes your smile so special.
It's something where "Just seeing you being happy" doesn't sound lame.
(Okay maybe a little)

It's something where no words can really describe why your heart skips a beat when his name is mentioned.




Love, for me, is you.

Okay.........
Mum, sis and dogs shall get jealous right about now. xD

Ancient Times

Matching dresses!!
Mushroom hairstyles!!
And after all these years, I'M STILL THE TALLER ONE.
xD

Where there are clouds, there will always be a silver lining

Life. It moves on. Just like the Earth. =]

Degree. First year, first semester. Okay. Ready for ya.

If you want your dreams to come true, don't oversleep. -- (Lucera Galthikhor Alrmond )

I didn't fall; I attacked the floor

Maybe she should go to a place where everyone wraps themselves as dumplings.
You know, those countries with cold weather throughout the whole year.

No one to say you're not in trend and going "Yerrr" at your not-awesome fashion sense.
No one to judge what you wear and wondering if that's the only shirt you have.
No one to compare that other girls look great in this and that, while you're forever stuck in jeans.

Just a place where what-is-comfortable finally beats what-looks-nice.

She will be disappearing for a three-days-two-nights-stay trip tomorrow.


**Wish you could go too. Wish I could make it up to you. Wish I could stop disappointing you. Wish I could help you more than throwing tantrums at you. I'm sorry.

I still remember the look on your face

Close the chapter, sweetie.
You've went through it.
The past was never a good place to stay anyway, and you know it.

That Sudoku 2 Game

That can be played horizontally or vertically or even upside-down with the running time and point system and highscores thingy in that black little thing called the iPod Touch that overnight at my place yesterday which belongs to this one wonderful owner called Tim Lim CJ which consists of Easy and Medium and Hard and Expert level which even Edson and Cassandra are addicted to too which I can't seem to beat my own high score anymore that gives me major headache just thinking which number goes to where in the Hard level that makes my eyes go blur which later on makes me feel like I wanna head the ZZZZZZZ's which concludes in I can't concentrate on studying. What the, I've done revisions already.

*Gasps for air*.
The Sudoku Game in that iPod touch, you are going down.
Don't want to see you anymore. For now.

Keeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

The owner of this blog went through some pictures the other day and found this picture. It was taken 2 weeks before Yuki gave birth to her 5 puppies.
[ One passed away at birth ] =(
RIP, little fella.
Which also meant it was 2 weeks before we've came to know Yuki was actually even pregnant.


Maybe those 4 dots were an oblivious sign or something, to signify that she's about to bring 4 lovely pups into this cruel lovely world of ours.
Coincidental, awe-inspiring, weird things just seem to happen in life.
(The 4 dots were light bulbs at the ceiling of the living room) xD


PS: Yuki is sleeping/resting/napping in the picture!!! =.=

And, and, and I see her big, fat tummy! And not knowing she was pregnant until the last minute?! Phew~ My family and I are amazing.

It's a weird thing

Love makes us act like we are fools. Sacrifices and all and still saying "It's worth it."

No one falls in love by choice, it's by chance. And no one falls out of love by chance, it's by choice.

Hectic.

What better way to have a great adjective used to end the month.

It's the end of the month! And April Fool's is in a week!
And she is the weird one who does not fancy April Fool's day one bit.

Last minutes. Due dates. And more last minutes.
Welcome to Malaysia, people. Because this is how things work around us when it comes to assignments, individual assignments, group assignments, big assignments, and more assignments.
And wait for it, finals are up next in 3 weeks time. And Algebra is a killer. Grinning at me with that wicked Trigonometry evil smile.
Which lovely Human Communication, too, had to be placed on the last day of Exams.
"Why??"
It means one week sem break and back to studying time, with MORE assignments in Degree.
"Gak."

Picture for self, and whoever that cares to read this crab (^^v) I'm typing. =x


Going for KFC during pasar malam time twice was incredibly awesome and genius of us.
The small, little, silly acts that smart people (us) do. =]


PS: Smelly toufu does not smell nice. It smells, uhm, the adjective describes it already. xD

Simba: I know what I have to do. But going back will mean facing my past. I've been running from it for so long.
[Rafiki hits Simba on the head with his stick]


[Swings his stick at Simba again who ducks out of the way]
Rafiki: Ha. You see? So what are you going to do?
Simba: First, I'm gonna take your stick.

=]

Come What May

Christian, a young wannabe Bohemian poet living in 1899 Paris, defies his father by joining the colorfully diverse clique inhabiting the dark, fantastical underworld of Paris' now legendary Moulin Rouge. In this seedy but glamorous haven of sex, drugs and newly-discovered electricity, the poet-innocent finds himself plunged into a passionate but ultimately tragic love affair with Satine, the club's highest paid star and the city's most famous courtesan. Their romance is played out against the infamous club - a meeting place of high life and low, where slumming aristocrats and the fashionably rich mingled with workers, artists, Bohemians, actresses and courtesans.





After watching Moulin Rouge in Films and Arts Appreciation class the other day, I still think the movie is fantastic (even if there were a few pervert scenes that makes you go =.="). YOUR SONG, for me, is especially special. It's on my most played play-list on my phone now.



Another Romeo and Juliet play. Another Jack Dawson and Rose story.
So the plot and storyline might be common; The synopsis and trailer may not be as convincing as it seems; However, the movie is simply beautiful as the story goes into a more understanding part of view. Advisable to be watched, for those who doesn't mind the whole movie being explained in singing, dancing, more singing and a perfect love story.
I don't care how old the movie is. I love it.

Tadpole notes

She went jump, jump, jump over 3 grades;


And somehow prepared to land on the moon taking this string thingy exam somewhere around June/July/August/September;


*fingers crossed*
Please be kind and don't clash with finals/midterm/tests/presentation days. =x



Ever had the feeling that you couldn't make up your mind and had to do both? xD

I spend my life complaining about petty problems, from small things to tiny stuff, while she tries hard to make her family proud.

I admit that I never know how to appreciate a certain thing until it's lost.
I still don't. Ask Mich, I just went to complain about a loved one, and let it all out on her like a punching bag. =x


Shall you fight or argue or shout, but never let go.
Because in the end, perhaps years later, you'll be hearing yourself say,
"We fought. We argued. We shouted at each other. But, we never gave up."

To him, who is in medical care

Do get well soon.

Your family needs you. And your daughter's waiting for you.
Will be praying and hoping.
Karen, stay strong.

On a boring Wednesday afternoon

She took out the green thing (camera),
and snapped random shots of (fluffy) loved ones. ♥





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