Don't lose yourself just because you found somebody

I wish I came across this last year, then I wouldn't have to go through whatever 2012 presented.
Although I'm actually glad I went through it, it didn't have to take so long for me to realize, right?
Then again, I'm glad I realized it in 18 months. It could have dragged on longer but, well, it didn't.

Whatever reason I had on hanging on turned out to hit me hard and smacked me in the face with a "You were wrong thinking that way!"

I thought I would only do things if the person turned out as someone special, as in boyfriend kind.
A boyfriend is different.
I'd only stay up late for him.
I'd only sacrifice time for him.
I'd only cross the continent for him.
I'd only fork out whatever there is in my wallet for him.
I'd only squeeze his hands in too-much-excitement movies.

Oh, wow. Okay. I sounded pathetic. I had to resize the font.
But honestly, back then I really thought a boyfriend'd be the only who would treat me special.
Well, smack me once more for I was wrong.
Keyword: Was

Turns out I'd actually do the same for everyone I love.
Yet, only one thing's different this time.
They'd do the same back for me. ♥



So, turns out crush has a crush on someone else. Turns out I've been overreacting when we're in the same room. Turns out I kinda blaaaaaaa when he's around, trying to get his attention and all. Soooooooooo what else is new? I guess I'm just not ready for a love relationship, not until I get myself right. Goals, dreams, hopes. Relationship can wait. I'm still young; young and free.